July 1, 2010
Well, we’re here at Zaca Lake.. no connections available. We’ll see if we can find some place on this property where I can get Wifi. Nobody is here except us. Our cabin had no charcoal grill so there was no place to cook. I walked up to the yurt and got the one from there and brought it all around the lake to our cabin. It was kind of noisy, me dragging it around the lake.
We had our barbecued hot dogs for dinner and the raccoons came right up to our table. They hopped up on the table and put out their little raccoon hands for some food. We gave them marshmallows, sourdough bread and chocolate. Eventually there were three raccoons and they were climbing on the cars, up on the bench and all around our feet.
Now it’s morning and we’re feeding the scrub jays who are arguing over chips. They argue about who should have the biggest chip. Mark and I are going to go wine tasting and then I have this dream of getting completely caught up on my editing, I have several manuscripts to review, write a few more chapters on my book, do some planning for the press, relax, swim, hike, drink, read…. I’m not really sure if all this is going to fit… but we will see.
Mark is continuing to read up on quantum physics and he is explaining quantum physics to Steve’s girlfriend. I don’t know if this is her primary level of interest. Mark is fascinated with quantum physics. He likes to read about entanglement and the movement of photons and explain this stuff to us on camping trips. It’s a little too early for alcohol, but with booze this conversation could be improved. Mark likes to explain the movement of light particles. Do we need to understand photons and light particles and the theory of many worlds? The state of superposition and what entanglement means… it has to do with how reality changes when we observe something.
Can we exist in both worlds at once? Mark says no. There could be two Steves, one is one reality, one in another. I like this, I want one Kate to stay here at the cabin and do all the work of Red Hen Press while the other Kate goes wine tasting, goes for a swim and then gets drinks wine and kicks back.
Mark says we exist in the freak zone where weird accidents happen. I say he’s right and this whole family lives in the freak zone. That might be a good chapter, living in the freak zone. I think I’ll add that into Wild Horses. This family is one big party.
I say they got the craziness from their dad. I remember Jerry’s grandmother who raised him telling me about him as a little boy in kindergarten. “He wouldn’t play with the other kids so I get called in to see the teacher, and the teacher tells me little Jerry won’t play with the other children, and I ask him why he won’t. Jerry looks at me kind of funny and says, “They’re really childish.”
I like that story not because Amy and Steve won’t play with other children, but because when they do, they always want the other kids to have as big a personality as themselves. They have huge personalities. They want the other kids to be completely unafraid of anything, to own the universe, to feel they are invincible, to not care what anyone thinks of them. To in fact, be like their dad.
When Steve’s in middle school, his teacher tells me that each of the kids gets to rate themselves on a one to ten scale and explain their rating. Most of the kids give themselves a four or a five based on their own shyness, their grades, their home behavior. Steve gives himself a fifteen. Based on what? The teacher asks. Your grades aren’t that good, are you that good at home? “Not really,” Steve says, “It’s based on me.”
“But what about you?”
“Just me, I’m completely cool.”
That’s something to start with. Believe you’re cool… and maybe others will go along with it as well.