Hospitals are all about fighting indignities or getting used to them.
I’ve spent very little time in hospitals. My daughter spent her first night at a hospital, my son has never spent the night. He was born at 8:20 am, I had lunch at home that day. I once spent three nights at the hospital with a kidney problem. My husband had never been to the hospital since he was a child. He has now been in the hospital two weeks and counting.
Hospitals break down your sense of dignity. Prisons are worse, but hospitals are no fun.
1. They keep track of your bathroom habits.
2. You tell them you are in pain; they make you wait. Mark was given medicine at 1 pm yesterday. At 4, he felt like hell and asked for medicine, they said it was on the way. At 8 pm, he was beside himself and I had to go to the boss nurse to get something to happen. They make you wait for everything.
3. You have to wear this clothing which makes you feel like a petri dish being examined by high schoolers.
4. The food is crappy and cooked in some vat.
5. Your bed is uncomfortable.
You lose control over bathing, eating, sleeping, pain, visitors.
At home, you can say this isn’t a good time. In the hospital, people visit around their own schedules.
You lose control over how you present yourself to the world. Let’s face it, the hospital gown looks good on nobody.
You lose control over how the place smells, the aesthetics of your environment.
You get lost in that world and it’s mind numbing and antiseptic and fluorescent. It feels like being in a trapped air zone where everything is being filtered to you through some flat faced robot. A zombie apocalypse would be a real plus in a hospital ward. A real pick me up.
Unless Mark comes home tonight, which seems unlikely, I’ll spend another night on ward. Praying for a zombie apocalypse, and an early release for Mark.