No Hurricane is happening anywhere near us

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We are waiting for a hurricane that hasn’t happened yet. The kids are playing cards and we are watching Star Trek Into the Darkness. The stars are shining and the moon is bright. The air is quiet. It’s just lovely out. We have brought in all the furniture, every single thing that isn’t already attached we brought into the house. But the whole island seems quiet.

People talk about getting ready for a “home invasion.” Let’s face it, if you are stocking up on weapons in your house in case you are attacked by zombies or children of the plague, you really have some problems that maybe you should deal with in therapy.

There are various levels of protecting oneself that make sense. Wherever you live, there is a possibility of some kind of danger from earthquake, fire, flood, tornado so you should have supplies for three days. Here in Hawaii, people have been stocking up on toilet paper and water. I understand the water, but really, is it a life and death matter to have toilet paper? Don’t answer because if the answer is yes, I don’t want to know.

At home we have earthquake kits in the car and in the house but the fact is that if an emergency were to go on longer than that, you would only be able to survive if you were smart and in good shape and able to figure things out. Our family is good at camping and travelling and cooking over a fire and making things out of nothing so we would be good people to hang out with in case of such an emergency, but it’s very hard to convince me that the world is going to end or that zombies are going to attack.

I’ve been warned all my life about a coming apocalypse and so far one has not happened.

If you are buying guns or stockpiling food or water for weeks and you do not live in Alaska or northern Canada or some other dangerous place, you really should see if you are a loony. However, if you have decided to be a crazy person and prepare your home for an invasion, here are some tips that were practiced at the cult where I grew up.

1. Have regular drills where the plan for what you will do in an invasion is practiced by the whole family. Blow a whistle and have your family all ready to go through the drill. Keep doing this until they can do it in two minutes or less. This will be particularly fun if anyone in your family is an older person. (If you decide to do this, let me know so I can stay away from you.)
2. Have an alarm system in place at your home so that if you are being invaded, the police will be notified. (This is a good one if you have stuff that someone could steal. I’m so afraid someone will steal our books.)
3. Collect resources of food and water and have them properly stored. The cult where I grew up had plenty of food and water stored, however, we did not stockpile weapons. A hunting rifle is a good thing if you legally hunt, and it’s in a locked case, but if you are the sort of person who has a handgun for home protection, and you don’t live in Alaska so it isn’t to shoot bears, well, again, you might want to think about whether you are a whack job. (We could last about a week on the food and water we have at the house.)
4. Get some training in how to do CPR and maybe even how to use a first aid kit. (I like this idea in theory but I don’t really have the time to do this.)
5. Have a dog or dogs to warn you about intruders. (We like this one. We have three dogs.)

Grady Powell of Asymmetric Solutions makes the following suggestion:
Remove shrubs and plants close to the house that make good hiding points. Better yet, replace them with thorny bushes that will discourage anyone from trying to move through them. Consider glass bricks as a relatively cheap and bombproof replacement for exterior windows in first floor bedrooms. Use quality locks and, even more important, install door jambs that will resist kicking and crowbars.
As a super economical alternative, drill 1-inch holes in the floor at the foot of both sides of the door and place pieces of steel pipe in them to secure the door at night. While not exactly aesthetic, the pipes can be easily removed and the holes covered by an entry mat. Make sure that entry and exits points are well lit and windows are covered to prevent people from getting a look at the valuables in your house. And get a dog- even the small ones bark when they sense an unwanted presence near or in the house.

If you really think most of this is a good idea, you should have yourself checked into a mental institution. A steel pipe across your door? Where do you live? Texas?
Asymmetric Solutions offers Combat Training, in Simulated Stressful Combat Conditions, taught by Experienced Combat Veterans.
Our programs are scientifically developed to give you the responsive systems andcombat mindset that equates to survival and a winning edge in a real-world crisis. Train for a real-world scenario at Asymmetric Solutions or find a similarly situated training facility.

If you want to have this kind of training from combat veterans, seriously stay away from me. Far away. I don’t want anyone with a combat mindset in my life. Peace is the answer.

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Published in: on August 8, 2014 at 12:31 am  Leave a Comment  
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