AWP, look for the girl who has her party on

AWP is a place where the makers meet the takers

And we all need to be makers. I flew up on the early flight with the makers. I’d like to see more people attending AWP asking themselves not what their country can do for them but what they can do for their literary country. We all need to be part of making this country work.

Let me tell you something fellow AWP goers. Nobody is out to get you. Sometimes I think writers smoke too much weed! Seriously. There is a problem with the over large ego and the mountain of insecurities. It’s a dreadful combination.

Like this. I am the greatest living writer in the world. I should be a Stegner fellow right now. What am I talking about? I should be teaching at Stanford, Harvard. Iowa should be begging for me to teach amongst the cornfields.

On the other hand….I am a self loathing little creature, one of the lowliest of God’s creations—think about that guy in Endgame locked in the tower, in a wheelchair with a bloody handkerchief over his head and two windows he can’t reach. Yeah, that guy, that’s me. I can’t even figure out how to get one single poem published. Nobody’s knocking down my door. They should be, but they’re not. I am a loser.

But I shouldn’t be! I should be noticed. Yeah, me. I’m a really important writer. If I weren’t a …… fill in your personal handicap here… white man, woman, poor woman, etc. then yes! I would be noticed all over the place. People would see me. But as it is due to my handicap I’m invisible!

Sometimes when I hear writers talk I think, Are you bipolar? Are you eleven? Are you mad? Do you hear yourself?

You are not the center of the universe. Enjoy being off center.

You are not the king/queen of the world. Enjoy being one of the knaves or wenches. They have more fun.
There is always someone more important than you are.

That’s enough advice. Oh, note to self: If you are going to mention that a writer is a lush and a womanizer, first look around and make sure that writer is not right behind you. I’m just saying it’s the kind of thing that’s easy to do at AWP because there are so many lushes and womanizers all around you all the time.

Other question, Why is there no word for the female version of womanizer? What would that be? Vamp? Seductress? I am sure that a lot of guys here at AWP would like to meet that woman, the playa girl. The promiscuous girl. Look around at the bar. She lives and breathes here at AWP.

Party on.

Published in: on February 28, 2014 at 9:05 am  Leave a Comment  

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