How cars define the American people?

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How big is your car? How fast is your car? Part of the American dream is a car. You have a house, a wife, kids and a car. The American dream includes a car. The question is what car you want to own.

Right before Christmas, Mark had lunch with Red Hen author Bart who was driving a brand new very large Toyota SUV. Bart lives alone and has no kids, but this SUV must be a vehicle he really likes because he’s always had an SUV since I’ve known him.

Our son’s girlfriend in Portland just bought a Mercedez. Now a Mercedez has some class. Just owning one says something about who you are, what you do, who you are and what you own. The same can be said for a BMW or a Lexus. All of them are status symbol cars. They make a statement about the fact that you are making it happen and you are successful.

Getting a Hummer really makes a statement. A very clear statement that says, My car is bigger than your car.

For example, the Prius is spoken of quite disparagingly in the movie The Other Guys. I like this movie. Here’s what they have to say about the Prius.
Terry Hoitz: What is this?
Allen Gamble: Its my car, Its a Prius.
Terry Hoitz: I feel like we’re literally driving around in a vagina.

Here is what they have to say about lions and tunas.

If I were a lion and you were a tuna, I would swim out in the middle of the ocean and freaking eat you and then I’d bang your tuna girlfriend.
Allen Gamble: OK, first off: a lion, swimming in the ocean. Lions don’t like water. If you placed it near a river or some sort of fresh water source, that make sense. But you find yourself in the ocean, 20 foot wave, I’m assuming off the coast of South Africa, coming up against a full grown 800 pound tuna with his 20 or 30 friends, you lose that battle, you lose that battle 9 times out of 10. And guess what, you’ve wandered into our school of tuna and we now have a taste of lion. We’ve talked to ourselves. We’ve communicated and said ‘You know what, lion tastes good, let’s go get some more lion’. We’ve developed a system to establish a beach-head and aggressively hunt you and your family and we will corner your pride, your children, your offspring.
Terry Hoitz: How you gonna do that?
Allen Gamble: We will construct a series of breathing apparatus with kelp. We will be able to trap certain amounts of oxygen. It’s not gonna be days at a time. An hour? Hour forty-five? No problem. That will give us enough time to figure out where you live, go back to the sea, get some more oxygen, and stalk you. You just lost at your own game. You’re outgunned and out-manned.
[pause]
Allen Gamble: Did that go the way you thought it was gonna go? Nope.

I’m going to replace my little old Honda with another Honda. A Honda says I want to get from Point A to Point B but I don’t want to break down along the way. A Honda is a friendly car; it isn’t pretentious and doesn’t make any grand statements. That’s why I want to get another one. It’s good to be back in LA. For a couple days at least.

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Published in: on January 12, 2014 at 9:38 pm  Comments (1)  
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One CommentLeave a comment

  1. Interesting perspective, thanks for sharing it.


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