George Clooney is on the market again

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Boat obsession–Ireland

Unless you’re living under a rock, you know that George Clooney is once again on the market. He’s got my number and I’m just waiting for the call. George! I’ll say, sure, I’ll meet you anywhere! And then it will start up again.

The odd thing about “actor love,” is how unreal it all is and how much it leads to unreal expectations in every day relationships.

Actors I’ve always thought dreamy: Denzel Washington, Ken Watanbe, George Clooney, Eric Bana, Jeremy Irons, Pierce Brosnan, Gabriel Byrne, Will Smith –won my heart in Men in Black, such an important movie for our family. All of them in movies are engaged in communication with other actors. They’re active and good-looking and exactly like the kind of guy you’d want to walk into a party with. Or drive up to a resort with and get out of a car looking so smooth.

But how often are you walking into parties or pulling up at resorts in real life? Unless you’re Paris Hilton, let’s be honest, that’s not happening too often. I walk into parties a few times a year, pull up at resorts even less. But when I do, I try to pull off a movie star look as I swank myself out of the car. This is dangerous. Too often I nearly trip on my feet. And walking into a party, I think, “Let’s get this party started.” I’m half kidding; like most extroverts, once I arrive, I don’t sweat what I’m wearing or how it compares to everyone else’s clothing. But movies affect how we enter and exit spaces and how we feel about our partners.

Most of real life is not at all like the movies. In real life, the sex isn’t well lit, the dinners are plopped on the plate, the kids’ smiles are lopsided and the dogs have muddy paws.

I begged my husband to continue dressing cute at home because in movies you’re a real loser if you’re slobbing it around your spouse. Think Forgetting Sarah Marshall. I wanted to make sure we were not turning into the kind of couple that wear sweats at home and think that’s okay.

Movies teach us that men are romantic. They wear tuxedos. They listen to women. They sneer in the face of danger. “I walk up to danger and make funny faces at it. They call me the panther.” Billy Bob Thornton from Bandits. They clean up really well and you can easily train them to be elegant. Think Zorro. They adore you and they’ll wait years for you. If you leave, they’ll come and chase you down. I’m not sure that’s even mentally healthy. I think if someone leaves you, a sign of self respect might be letting them go.

Movies idealize men. In real life, even the really great men I know can be babies some of the time. Here are some things real life might do to annoy you:
1. They might wear the same clothes day after day or have favorite clothes that annoy you.
2. They might not like talking to you on the phone.
3. They might get tired of your talking all the time.
4. They might get tired of the kids constant noise.
5. They might want to zombie out sometimes in the evening.
6. They might look at other girls.
7. They might not cook.
8. They might not appreciate your family/sisters/friends.
9. They not always be up for it. I know! It’s terrible to imagine, but I hear about these things and I have to warn you, my dear blog reader.
10. They might not be praying when they say, Oh God. On the other hand, they might be saying a prayer of thanks. How good are you?

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Published in: on July 14, 2013 at 12:42 pm  Leave a Comment  

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