Damocles’ sword

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Los Angeles is hot, and back in the heat, I feel exhausted. Mark did all the driving, but I’m still tired.

One of my favorite stories as a kid was Damocles’ sword. In the story, Damocles is allowed to be king, but only if he is willing to have a sword hanging over his head. Many of us are willing to live in what feels like peril as long as we can have something we want.

The thing I was most afraid of was being kicked out on my own, leaving the Farm which was the only way to Heaven, and not knowing anyone and being out in the cold. And then it was happening, and it was cold, but it was always wonderful. The thing we are most afraid of is sometimes the thing that when it’s traveling toward us at light speed, it might be the best thing for you and you don’t know it. That breakup, leaving your job, having your car blow up like George Clooney’s did in Michael Clayton. And all that is rushing toward you and you wake up and you know that you’re in a new part of your life, and that part is an adventure too. But that adventure scares us.

When you sit on one side of the hill, you’re crouched there, often afraid that there are tigers on the other side of the hill. People tell you that the tigers want to eat you, but they don’t. The tigers are on the other side of the hill, lying in a field of lilies and in those lilies, there you are. The tigers are not really going to hurt you.

That isn’t to say that people don’t quit their job and sometimes wish they hadn’t or leave their spouse and then regret it. But, even in those tangled webs, we learn that we aren’t as smart as we thought we were. That’s how we move forward.

Oddly, we resist change in others. Four people I know are hitting the rocks with their relationships, and at least most of them, I wish would stay with their partners. We get used to people being together and we wish for them to stay with their partners. We get used to them as a couple. And even when they’re telling everyone loud and clear that they need to move on, people around them like to stick them back together like paper dolls and glue.

Whenever change happens at the press, I wish things would stay the same, but the changes are always for the best. That’s work.

But love and relationships change and move. Relationships must move around like water. They cannot stay static. Some of the changes feel good. Others feel like we are a star expanding and contracting and we’re not ready to be galactic beings. Or we don’t think we are, but we are. We are.

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Published in: on May 13, 2013 at 10:18 pm  Leave a Comment  
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