Why I don’t pay my bills online

January 26th, 2012


There is enough misinformation about me floating around and I certainly don’t want anyone starting to think I pay all my bills on time.


Honestly, I don’t like the idea of paying my bills online for the following reasons:


  1. What if I don’t have enough $ in my acct which let’s face it, I usually don’t.
  2. What if I want to support the Occupy movement by closing my BofA account? –Would the Occupy movement know or care?  Probably not.  Would Bank of America care?  Definitely not.  They wouldn’t even notice.  I am one of millions for them, I am a mini thread on a pixel in their universe.
  3. I like envelopes and stamps
  4. I like pretending to be in control.
  5. Most of all, I want to know when $ is being taken from me.


However, whenever I can, I like $ to be automatically put into my account.  Whenever there is a check coming my way, I try to have it fall swiftly as rain into my empty account so that I can soak up the moisture.


I also do not use credit cards.  Okay, that’s a lie.  I have an Amex for emergencies,  but I don’t use it.  I have one other credit card I use once a year or so—the Victoria Secret card.  Every girl’s friend.


I signed on for both Gilt and Groupon thinking that something would come up that I just had to have.  Some restaurant I had to try.  Something pampering or spa service. Shoes.  The perfect dress.  So far, many months later.  Nothing.  I lack the proper interest in shopping.  I was at Ross today for quite a while helping my son pick clothes for a job interview.  While I waited I found a shirt.  For my husband.  And three dollars worth of dish cloths.


I’m not really all that frugal or virtuous.  I simply lack the shopping gene.  Plus, I look simply rotten in almost everything I try on.  I am a size ten.  Clothes that look good are sizes 2-6.  Six is the top you can still really say you look good in.  But I am working out like a maniac this year so all that is sure to change.  Maybe I’ll change it all up.  Shopping won’t seem like a nasty chore, but more like walking or drinking wine or anything else you look forward to.  Doubtful.


But back to the online paying of bills.  I wouldn’t think it would work for me unless I had a much bigger income.  I do pay my bills like many people on payday.  I pay almost exactly the same amount every month and then have whatever left for the month—never enough.


As soon as I have some real money in my account, then I’m going green, the money for the electric bill, gas bill, cell phone etc will just sift out of my account like dust off a butterfly’s wings.  I’ll keep floating on, knowing there’s more where that came from.  This would also free up the part of my brain that is always sweating blood on whether we’ll make it to think about other things—stories, nests, feathers.


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