How to Lose Weight

February 2nd, 2013

Americans want to lose weight. Americans are overweight and they dream of losing weight. We all do. There is bad food around us all the time and we have to ignore it.

If you want to be thin, you have to ignore all the fast food in the world. No In N’Out, no Carls Jr, McDonalds or Burger King, Jack in the Box is out of the question. You can’t eat any fast food. No pizza. No French fries. No fried food. Don’t even think about Kentucky Fried Chicken.

If you are in a hurry and you need some food quickly, Subway is the way to do it. Because at Subway, you can get 300 calories of healthy food. Of course, the bread isn’t good if you are on a diet. You should not be eating carbs.

Okay, no fast food. No carbs—that’s no corn, potatoes, rice, bread, cake, cookies, no sweets, no pasta.

Drink a lot of water.

Then of course, there’s exercise. You should be exercising all the time. Well, maybe not all the time, but definitely every day. Most of that should be cardio. You’re going to be exercising and eating nothing but vegetables and protein with a little fruit thrown in.

Here is the funny thing. Everyone knows all this stuff. Everyone knows that the reason we, as a nation are overweight is that we all tend to eat too much, we eat the wrong things and we eat too much of them.

It’s the oddest thing that millions of Americans want to be thin and aren’t even though we know the solution. It’s behavior modification.

Are we a slave to our appetites? Can we not control ourselves? Are we bored?

We want to have a magic pill that will make all this happen. And while we’re at it, why not a magic pill to make us rich. To make us exciting. To make us rich. To make us happy.

I think that being thin is a good and happy thing. I think that people who are too much overweight don’t get any respect and that’s sad. For whatever reason, being a drunk means that you’re well, just a drunk. Being a druggie means you are sort of a loser, but still you could look good and looking good is everything.

I think the reason we fear being old is that old people get no respect in our culture. And by the same token, we fear being overweight because that’s a guaranteed lack of respect. Neither of these is the way it should be. I won’t argue that both of these is wrong. We should respect people for who they are. I believe in that with all my heart. I want to be respected whether I am fat or thin, old or young, well dressed or not.

But, we don’t live in a perfect world.

In the meantime, I’d like to be thin. I think I could get a lot of respect. I’ll let you know how it works out.

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